I have so much to say, but I don't know exactly how to say it. I've been eating jumbo size pieces of humble pie. It hasn't been the most fun and tasty thing I've ever eaten, but it has led me to conclude that the foundation for happiness isn't in just becoming, but in being grateful for what you've learned along the way. There are a lot of lessons embedded in every experience encountered, even if all you can see at the time is pain.

Right now I am trying to find the real me, not what I am suppose to be, but what I am meant to be. Sometimes, okay a lot of times looking inward is like taking a dose of cough syrup... it is difficult to swallow something that tastes so rancid, but in the end it sooths all symptoms of pain. I am not saying looking inward is rancid by any means, rather it is difficult to face those feelings of vast ineptness and other insecurities... to dig them up and deal with them. In dealing with them you have to stop the reflexive nature of wanting to put them up on the storage shelves of memories and bury them deep.

As I have encountered such boxes of feelings I have had to examine what's inside and see the reasons why they are still there. Opening boxes that have been taped shut for so long have offered new insights into what it means to be me.

I believe in the goodness of people.

My sensitivity is a strength not a weakness.

I am a beloved daughter of God.

I don't define myself but what I have, but rather what I do.

I am a hopeful disillusioned idealist.

I believe in showing mutual respect to everyone regardless of difference.

I believe in the Constitution of the United States of America.

I am a patriot.

I love policy.

I love research.

I love being involved in community development.

I love learning and teaching.

I am not sorry for my religious beliefs, for they are true.

I no longer feel the need to apologize for being me.

I am politically independent.

I am making a difference in my sphere of influence and I will continue to do so whenever and wherever I can.

I believe in the power of giving of oneself in developing unity in communities.

Rather then getting upset when things go wrong, go about trying to figure ways to make things better.